Adopting a Topiary

There are some obligations regarding the care of a topiary. It is easiest to relate the care of a Topiary to that of a child in the creation of a nuturing ambience in which a topiary can thrive however teenage topiary (TT) come with advantages over teenage children.

Just imagine

  • 1 You know where your teenage topiary at all times
  • 2 Your have complete control over the time spent under the shower
  • 3 They don't make a mess in what was a clean kitchen
  • 4 They stay put until you decide they should move.
  • 5 Their pots are unisex and can be inherited by future generations
  • 6 They don't cause endless laundry
  • 7 They don't own cars that drip oil on the driveway
  • 8 They are great listeners and just never answer back
  • 9 They never ask to borrow your car.
  • 10 They still respond well to a good clip
  • 11 Best of all if you adopt... that padlock can come off the fridge.

 

Ahhh!!!!! If only I had listened all those years ago.....I could have saved all that money and heart ache and just bought a TT. I can vouch for these TT's as I have known them all since they earned the right to their first trainers......Some people may say I have spent more time with them than I have my own Kids so if you if you take on the responsibility of adopting one of my beauties you will have to recite and agree to the Teenage topiary growers Pledge:

The TT adopters pledge

I will be diligent at all times in the endeavour to create a nuturing caring enviroment that will limit stress to a minimum

I will pay close attention at all times to the needs of my TT

I will take my T T holiday with me.....or check them into a licenced TT care provider for the duration

I will clip my TT when necessary but only lightly enough as to improve its appearance

I will treat my TT to water on a frequent basis keeping it moist to the touch at all times

I will treat my TT to regular feeds and as with any growing teenager supply abundant quantifies of good quality balanced plant food as per the manufacturers instructions.

I will be vigilant and treat where necessary any pests and diseases that may effect the long term health and vigor of my TT